How to Help Families Read at Home, Without the Pressure or Guilt
- Melissa McCall
- Nov 12
- 8 min read
Updated: Nov 18
Connection Over Perfection
Not long ago, I had the opportunity to meet with an amazing advocate for early literacy. We were discussing the hardships of today’s literacy crisis and the little things we can do from the very beginning to make a big impact.
When we started talking about reading at home, she said something I had never considered before: “We always tell parents, ‘Read, read, read.’ And honestly, continually saying this adds a lot of guilt and shame for parents.”
Wow. I had never thought about it that way. We all know the benefits of reading at home, but she might be onto something. We often remind families to read, but are we really considering the outside factors? Are we empowering them with simple tips, tricks, and tools, or just repeating the message without offering real support?
Maybe, unintentionally, we’re making families feel guilty about reading. I know as a young parent, I felt bad when I was simply too tired to read that second bedtime story. If we set reading up as another checkbox on an already overwhelming list of parenting tasks, we could be adding to their guilt, or even deterring families from reading altogether.
Reading isn’t about perfection or performance. It’s about connection. It’s those moments when children snuggle close, hear the rhythm of your voice, and begin to fall in love with words.
In this post, we’ll share ways to help families build reading routines that feel easy, natural, and pressure-free.
Together, we’ll look at how to shift from guilt to guidance so that reading becomes something families want to do, not something they feel they have to do but don’t know how.
Why Reading Really Matters
Here’s the truth: reading aloud truly changes the brain.
Research consistently shows that children who are read to regularly develop stronger vocabularies, better comprehension, and greater long-term reading success. A study from The Ohio State University found that children who are read to frequently will have heard over one million more words by kindergarten than their peers who aren’t read to as often. That’s a million extra opportunities to make connections, build understanding and background knowledge, and strengthen language networks in the brain.
Access also matters. Four decades of international research across cultures and income levels reveal that access to books in the home is one of the strongest predictors of educational achievement. Children who grow up in homes with more books read more frequently, develop stronger reading skills, and complete more years of education—even after accounting for parental education levels.
A report from Scholastic highlights that increasing children’s access to books leads to “dramatically positive effects” on reading growth and achievement. Similarly, studies from the National Literacy Trust and the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) confirm that the number of books in the home directly correlates with reading success, regardless of socioeconomic background.
The key takeaway? Children don’t just need to be told that reading is important. They need to experience it. Even brief, playful moments with books can make a powerful difference.
Why Are Children Being Read to Less and Less?
Recent data reveals a concerning trend. A HarperCollins study found that only 41% of children under the age of four are read to frequently...a steep drop from previous years. And according to the Scholastic Kids & Family Reading Report (2022), families are reading to their youngest children less often than ever before.
In 2018, 43% of parents said they read to their newborns, but by 2022 that number had dropped to just 37%. Even more telling, fewer parents reported being encouraged to read to their babies...63% in 2018 compared to 54% in 2022.
So, if we know that reading matters and that it builds language, relationships, and brain connections from day one, why are so many children being read to less often?
The reasons are complex, and they often have little to do with motivation or love. Most parents want to help their children thrive, they just need the knowledge, access, and encouragement to make it happen.
Here are a few common realities I see:
Many parents don’t know how early to start. Fewer families are being told that reading should begin from birth. Programs like Reach Out and Read are helping pediatricians share that message early, showing parents that reading aloud strengthens attention, vocabulary, and bonding from the very beginning.
Books aren’t always accessible. Not every home has a shelf full of books. For some families, books can feel like a luxury. Libraries may be far away, transportation may be limited, or families may not know which books best fit their child’s age or language. Local organizations like Promising Pages in Charlotte and community book banks across the country are helping close that gap.
Life is busy. Between long work hours, errands, meals, and bedtime routines, carving out quiet reading moments can feel impossible. For many families, screens have replaced the calm of shared reading time, not out of neglect, but out of sheer exhaustion.
Pressure and guilt. When families constantly hear that they “should” read more, it can trigger shame rather than action. I remember the guilt I felt as a parent of young children when I was just too tired to read that second story at bedtime. Parents start to feel like they’re failing instead of supported. And guilt rarely motivates...it overwhelms.
Language and literacy barriers. Some parents may not be fluent readers themselves or may lack books in their home language. Without guidance or culturally relevant materials, they may feel disconnected from the process altogether.
Children don’t always seem interested, leaving parents confused. Every teacher and parent has been there...a child wiggles away, interrupts, or shows no focus. But attention grows with exposure. Even one page, a short rhyme, or a funny sound effect can spark curiosity over time.
Often times, it’s a mix of many of these things. When reading begins to feel like a chore, when access is limited, or when guilt replaces joy, reading simply stops happening.
But the good news? It doesn’t take much to turn things around. With encouragement, access, and a focus on connection over perfection, we can help families rediscover reading as a moment of joy, not pressure.
Let’s dive into how to make that happen.
Empowering Families to Support Reading at Home
For many families, reading can feel overwhelming, especially when life is busy, children are wiggly, or books aren’t easily available. The good news? Building a literacy-rich home doesn’t require perfection. It just takes connection, consistency, and creativity.
Here are 5 ways we can help families make reading feel easier, more natural, and less intimidating:
1. Record Yourself Reading and Share It with Families
This idea came from an amazing teacher in our community, and it’s one of my favorites. Try recording yourself reading aloud to your class and sharing the video with families.
It’s a simple but powerful way to:
Spark conversations at home about classroom stories
Give children without books the chance to rewatch and listen again
Model fluency, expression, and comprehension strategies for families
Even a short story shared through video can make reading more accessible for everyone.
Or even better, invite them in for story time and a snack! No better way to see high-quality reading in action!
2. Share Quality Media Options
Like it or not, screens are a part of modern family life, so let’s use them for good. Recommend story-based media that encourages language development and listening comprehension.
Some of my favorite, research-backed options include:
Storyline Online – Free videos of actors reading children’s books aloud
Julie’s Library – Julie Andrews and her daughter share wonderful stories and reflections
Circle Round – NPR’s storytelling podcast based on folktales from around the world
Molly of Denali Podcast – Focuses on problem-solving, storytelling, and cultural learning
Sharing these helps families replace passive screen time with interactive story experiences.
3. Encourage Storytelling as Connection
Not every literacy moment has to include a book. Storytelling itself builds vocabulary, sequencing, and comprehension, and can be just as effective as reading aloud. Encourage families to tell stories about their day...
“Remember when we went to the park?” “What do you think would happen if our dog could talk?”
These moments build the same oral language networks that support reading comprehension later on.
Check out our Coffee Chat Pads for more family storytelling prompts!
4. Provide Supportive Tip to Families with Uninterested Children
Every parent has been there...a child who just won’t sit still for story time. The goal isn’t to make reading perfect, but to make it present. Share these quick, no-pressure tips with families:
Read even if your child isn’t sitting still. They’re still listening!
Don’t save reading just for bedtime when you both are tired. Try reading at snack time, during bath time, or while waiting in the car.
Choose books related to your child’s current interests (even if that means reading about trucks every night for a week).
Treat books as play props! The interest to read might come later. Check out this video!
Reading doesn’t have to look quiet or formal. It can look like joy in motion.
5. Start a Take-Home Library
If your program or school can, create a small rotating library that families can borrow from each week. Children can “check out” one book at a time and return it the following week, giving them consistent access to stories even if they don’t have books at home. This is the SIMPLEST way to build that home and school connection through reading!
We’ve developed a complete system to make this easy for classrooms and centers. JOIN OUR WAITLIST to be the first to know when we launch our new program.
Final Thoughts...
Reading doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be a bedtime tradition. It just has to happen in connection.
When we help families feel capable instead of guilty, we are setting up our children for a better future. Let’s start empowering families with what they can do at home!
Grab our free Christmas Book Countdown Connection Cards to share with families! That extra step in reading made simple!
What's Next?
If you’re ready to help families make reading simple, joyful, and meaningful, here’s where to start:
Join our newsletter for low-pressure literacy ideas you can share with families.
Explore our Ultimate Home Connection Bundle to build deeper connections and empower families
Sign up for the Take-Home Library Waitlist to learn how to create your own take-home library at your center and give EVERY child access.
Follow along on YouTube for quick read-alouds, literacy tips, and story inspiration.
Together, we can change how families experience reading, one story, one connection, and one conversation at a time.
Happy Learning! Be sure to LIKE, SHARE and COMMENT on this post!
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Sources
Allington, R. (2014). Closing the Reading Gap. Scholastic Education Research. Link to Scholastic Report
Evans, M. D. R., Kelley, J., Sikora, J., & Treiman, D. J. (2010). Family scholarly culture and educational success: Books and schooling in 27 nations. Research in Social Stratification and Mobility, 28(2), 171–197.
Evans, M. D. R., Kelley, J., & Sikora, J. (2014). Scholarly culture and academic performance in 42 nations. Social Forces, 92(4), 1573–1605.
HarperCollins Children’s Books. (2023). Very concerning’: HarperCollins research shows only 43% of under-fours are read to frequently. The Bookseller.
Logan, J. A. R., Justice, L. M., Yumuş, M., & Chaparro-Moreno, L. J. (2019). When children are not read to at home: The million word gap. Journal of Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics, 40(5), 383–386.
Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD). (2010). PISA 2009 Results: Learning to Learn—Student Engagement, Strategies and Practices.
Reach Out and Read. (n.d.). The importance of reading aloud from birth. reachoutandread.org
Scholastic Kids & Family Reading Report™. (2022). Findings reported in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel: Decline in families participating in storytime together. Scholastic Education Research.
Sullivan, A., & Brown, M. (2013). Social inequalities in cognitive scores at age 16: The role of reading. National Literacy Trust.
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